Protecting Your Child from the Negative Effects of Divorce

 Posted on October 19, 2017 in Family Law

It used to be said that children were resilient, and they could recover easily from divorce. We now know this is not true. Recent studies suggest that children may experience a host of problems both during and after divorce, from emotional, behavioral and mental health problems, to maladjustment and developmental issues. Thankfully, parents can mitigate against such problems. The following information explains how.

Strive for a Child-Centered Divorce

It might not have felt this way, but your child has always been separate from your marriage. Yes, you and your spouse may have conceived and parented together, but the relationship that each of you has with your child is individual, special, and unique. Though the marriage is ending, the bond between the child and each parent will remain. Parents who remember this and strive to protect not just their own relationship with the child, but also the child’s relationship with the other parent, often see fewer negative issues in their children during and after the divorce process. So, put away the team shirt, watch what you say around your child, and avoid oversharing details about the divorce and you may successfully protect your child’s need for unconditional love, time, and attention from both of their parents.

Let Kids Be Kids

Perhaps one of the most under-discussed issues in divorce is when parents lean on their child for mental or emotional support during the divorce. Though rarely intentional, parents who do this increase their child’s risk of serious mental health issues, including depression and anxiety. Children may also begin to harbor feelings of anger, resentment, and grief because they do not want to burden their parents with their own emotional baggage. Remember: you and your spouse are the adults. Seek emotional support from family, friends, support groups, and mental health professionals – not from your child. Also, be sure that you remain aware of your child’s mental and emotional state;  that way you can be there to listen when they need you.

Know Where to Find Help

No matter how hard you and your spouse work toward an amicable divorce, how successful you are at co-parenting, or how successful you are in being an adult about your own emotions while also being there for your child, there may still be a need for outside professional help. There is no reason to be alarmed about this. Children sometimes internalize divorce, and there could be underlying issues that are amplifying the impact the divorce is having on your child. Seeking help sooner, rather than later, is preferable, as it increases the chances of a favorable outcome for you and your child.

Contact Our Hillside, IL Divorce Attorney

At the Law Office of Vincent C. Machroli, P.C., we work hard to protect the best interests of children during divorce. Knowledgeable and experienced, our Hillside, IL divorce lawyer can assist with all your divorce needs, including the development of a parenting plan. Schedule a personalized, no-obligation consultation to get started. Call 708-449-7400 today.

Source:

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/3-ways-parents-protect-children-divorce-article-1.3420632